How to buy a keyboard

I’m shopping for a keyboard/synthesizer so I can learn to play piano better and have something to make nerdy electronic music. I’m sitting here, staring at MusiciansFriend.com and realizing that it’s a terrible idea to try to buy an instrument that I don’t know how to play.

Here is how I shop for a keyboard:

1. People seem to care about the number of keys. A full keyboard has 88, so 61 is good for a beginner, right?
2. I don’t really get MIDI, but I know I need it if I’m going to hook it up to my computer.
3. Okay, that still leaves me with like 50 options.
4. My friend Justin said something about weighted keys. I don’t see anything about that on here.
5. Ooo, I want one with a sample pad!
6. Oh wait, $2600. Never mind.
7. Too many words I don’t understand. “16-part multitimbral, dual polyphonic arpeggiators, and 384 combinations constructed of up to eight programs each.” I think my brain just melted a little.
8. Maybe reading reviews will help. Wait. This guy bashed it to pieces in his review, but then gave it four out of five stars. I can trust no one.
9. Screw it, let’s just see what I can get a deal on that most people don’t complain about.

My guess is this isn’t that far off from how most people buy things. It seems like everything has about the same base features, so I could probably just roll the dice and end up with something I won’t hate.

I think I’ve narrowed it down to three. Would anyone care to enlighten me?